I was recently married a couple of months ago and things are going great. Nothing has really changed, since, you know, we've been together for 11 years and living together for about six. So getting married was more of a, "Hey, let's make it official" type thing.Everything has stayed the same...with one exception...my last name. Now I haven't officially been able to change my last name because the government of Ontario seems to think that 10 weeks is an acceptable amount of time to wait to register the marriage. And I can't get a marriage certificate until the marriage is registered. And I can't change the name on my driver's licence or any other sort of legal document until I have that marriage certificate in my hands. I had no idea this would even take this long. But any ways...I've had a good two months to be able to think about my new name.
Sasso Shmasso
First of all, I LOVE being a Sasso. It's the name I've had for the last 31 years. So I'm having trouble just tossing it aside like it's nothing. I've never understood the rush to just change one's name. I see it on Facebook all of the time. Girls changing their names the day after they get married. No big deal. I wonder, doesn't it bother them? I mean, their last name has been part of their identity for all of their lives. I couldn't wait to change my relationship status to Married....but my last name? Now hold up.
Sasso meant something in Jamaica. I've been told that it was a name to be proud of back in the day. People knew the name Sasso and I've been raised with this sense of pride. I loved being called Sasso in high school. Hell, even my husband has been calling me Sass since...I can't remember when. Before we were married I asked him with puppy eyes, "You'll still call me Sass, right?" The thought of having this name ripped away from me because I'm supposed to take my husband's last name is kind of gut wrenching.
I know, I'm being overly dramatic. But I can't be alone in this thinking...right??
Wrong!
As soon as we were married I began to realise the expectations people had. On wedding cards and gifts, people addressed us as Mr. and Mrs. Mitchell, or Craig and Nikki Mitchell. I thought it was funny to see this from women I know hadn't changed their own names after getting married. I mean, they must understand what I'm going through? Nope. Not really. It's not a big deal. One declared that she just didn't get around to changing her name. It was more an act of laziness than anything else. Don't people over think these things like I do??
I guess not.
Well, what's in a name? EVERYTHING!! So the debate remains. Should I hyphenate? Should I just keep my own name? Or should I just quit whining and step in line with what's expected...and just take my husband's last name?
Well, since our marriage certificate hasn't come in yet, I'm still officially a Sasso. I still have time to debate this issue.
